Cyber Cliques

by Maddy on February 24, 2011

in Blog Soup

Before I start today’s Blog Soup, I wanted to ask you guys to please send good thoughts and prayers for fellow blogger Sniff from In Sniff’s Choos. She’s currently in the hospital and needs all the good energy and positive vibes we can send her way!

In Tuesday’s post, I mentioned that popularity only matters in high school.  However, there’s still one thing I find that hasn’t changed  much from those years, even in blog world – cliques.  Remember the Mean Girls’ scene in the cafeteria? Yea, it’s often very similar to that. And much like my experience in high school, I find that I don’t fit into any  one category – I’m not a cook, baker, fashionista, DIY, Etsy shop owner, etc… Sure, I love photography,  but I don’t fall into the mamarazzi category or the artsy photography person either. So I’m always just flailing around in cyberspace –  a girl who likes to write a lot of random stuff about my life and take a couple pictures here and there. And even though my experience in blog world has been far better than my time in high school, there’s often been times where I’ve felt like the “uncool” chick in the room .  Times when I’ve visited blogs that I like in hopes of making a new friend with a unique interest (that I appreciate, but don’t partake in myself), but not seeing the interest returned.  Now like I mentioned before, I don’t believe in tit-for-tat commenting, but I do appreciate every single person that takes the time to read my blog.  And even if it doesn’t always seem like we have a lot in common, once I dig a little deeper, I always find a common ground. And what’s even more fascinating is that the folks I thought I’d have the least in common with have turned out to be some of my dearest blog friends! Maybe if I was a bit more topic-centric, it’d be a different story, but I like writing about everything and I like having blog friends from all walks of life!  So tell me…

Topic blogs versus “lifestyle” blogs: is there a difference? If so, which do you prefer?

{ 36 comments… read them below or add one }

Life with Kaishon February 24, 2011 at 1:18 am

Really? You don’t feel cool?
The minute I met you, I could tell there was something cool about you. It wasn’t just the fact that we were surrounded by 40 somethings : )- there was DEFINITELY something cool about you!
I love your friendliness and your smile! You are so easy to talk to. You inspired me!

I like blogs of people I connect with. I go to some fashion blogs and some art blogs and some photography blogs. I don’t have to love your genre of blog to visit you, I just have to love your posts. If I read a good one and I think I can find more I will usually come back. You know, time permitting!
Life with Kaishon recently posted..a cell phone camera picture contest! say what

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Sarah - Dodeline Design February 24, 2011 at 8:00 am

Personally, I really like a healthy mix of blogs to read. Being a designer, I of course love to read design related blogs, and an Etsy shop owner, so handmade blogs are up my alley too, but you know – one can only take so much of a certain thing. So that’s part of why I love your blog, because it’s different from my some of my other “usuals.” My blog is kind of random I guess too, but I’m not trying to be Style Me Pretty or anything, I just kind of enjoy the 20 minutes I spend each day with it. I think as long as you’re happy with it, that’s all that matters :-)
Sarah – Dodeline Design recently posted..Top 5 Reasons to Blog

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Angelia Sims Hardy February 24, 2011 at 8:05 am

I can totally relate! I don’t feel so alone in bloggy world now. :-)

I had a “popular” blogger comment on my blog. I was sooo thrilled! It was silly. Do you know if she had actually read the blog post, she wouldn’t have commented and said what she said. In other words, her question was in the blog post. It definitely made me feel uncool, or not worthy, or whatever it is.

I think you are fab! Crafty and talented. You are bright and beautiful, not to mention wise beyond your years.
Angelia Sims Hardy recently posted..Winter Garden Wonder

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Buckeroomama February 24, 2011 at 8:19 am

I’m with Becky on this: “I like blogs of people I connect with.” Whatever that connection might be.

I knew when I started this blog that I want to be able to talk about different things or at least keep it “open” that I’d be able to write about topics other than motherhood, hence the “among other things” part. :)
Buckeroomama recently posted..Her First Bun

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likeitsgolden February 24, 2011 at 8:29 am

I find that I go to the blogs that post about more random stuff more often b/c i expect to find a something interesting. I like alot of topic blogs but im usually more into them when im in the mood for that particular thing, like when i get the domestic itch I read more of my food blogs, or when i all bout clothes I go to the fashion blogs.

The blogs that i like most are a bit more personal where I feel like im getting to know the person a bit by reading their blog, where a bit of their personality shines through. Blogs where the person shares a bit about there kids, a good recipe, some cool clothes and other things for example. Your blog is like this and I hope that mine is as well.
likeitsgolden recently posted..Until it happens

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Couture Carrie February 24, 2011 at 8:33 am

I comment equally on all types of blogs… If someone is kind enough to visit Couture Carrie and leave a comment, I always comment back :)

xoxox,
CC

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Keeley February 24, 2011 at 9:03 am

I love blogs where I feel a connection to the writer. In the case of your blog, I enjoy the topics you present and I met you in person, so your blog feels more “real” to me.

Although I blog about food, I have so many other interests. Cooking is one of my favorite hobbies and it’s a “safe” topic, so I feel comfortable sharing it with the world. I’d love to write more about my personal life or politics or education, but I’m cautious because of my career.

I just like blogs that are real. I don’t appreciate blogs that are full of giveaways, promotions, coupons, and product reviews and don’t offer any real content. I want to feel like I just had a conversation with a friend after I read a blog post.
Keeley recently posted..Cheddar Biscuits

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Amy February 24, 2011 at 9:42 am

I lean toward narrative blogs, myself … with topics that run the gamut. That’s life–and it’s more real to me. So when I sit down, first thing in the morning, coffee in hand, and read my favorites … it’s as if I’m chatting with a friend. The perfect start to my day!

Sure, I read the others–food, fashion, home design, etc. But I find, more often than not, they’re a lot like the cool kids at school … they all kinda look the same … and while fun to watch from afar … they don’t really stick with me … :)

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very married February 24, 2011 at 9:44 am

huh. you know, i don’t really see the cliques. i definitely feel you, though, about the wanting to get blog love back from someone you admire or find interesting. Also, at least you have a “sorta” topic – like, you definitely have a photography leaning. I just write about what’s on my mind. And i know that makes it so i don’t have a large following or a solid group of blog friends that all blog-know each other and blog-hang out. But then again, i have a smaller group that *I* blog-know and that *I* blog-hang out with. And, occasionally, i add to that group from someone new that I found interesting!
very married recently posted..Umm awkward- An interview recap

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dana February 24, 2011 at 9:44 am

I read your post “it takes two” and I really like your look on commenting. Sometimes I feel like it is some sort of competition with all of these commenting numbers. I really do not feel like my blog is worth anything at all here in cyberspace. But then I try to remember why I satrted blogging to begin with. Not to “be cool”, but to share our life with family and friends far away. and to document my journey in photography. to look back and see how I have changed since I started. And it gives me satisfaction to share my photos with people that I know likes to see them.
I have to say, when I found your blog, I thought you where super cool! I think your varity in your posts make it so fun and worth to follow this blog! Keep blogging your own way!
I´m glad you wrote this post! It was important for me to read!
dana recently posted..capture the moment

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Cafe Fashionista February 24, 2011 at 9:54 am

Personally, I’m with CC…I comment on all varieties of blogs – food, lifestyle, fashion, celebrity, books… – equally. I don’t discriminate. As long as there is something there that piques my interest, I’ll check it out! :)
Cafe Fashionista recently posted..Thrifty Thursday- J Crew Maritime-Stripe Blazer on a Budget

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Camila F. February 24, 2011 at 10:11 am

I like good, creative and original blogs! It doesn’t matter if the blog is popular or not, I like the connections we can make through them.

And you described me perfecly: I’m also ” a girl who likes to write a lot of random stuff about my life and take a couple pictures here and there”.
Camila F. recently posted..Casinhas de papelão

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Kristin February 24, 2011 at 10:31 am

I don’t discriminate…While I love and write mostly about fashion, I read blogs from all over the spectrum! And I can’t imagine you as anything but a cool kid my dear! xoxo
Kristin recently posted..Champagne Saturday- On The Road Again

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Anaiz February 24, 2011 at 10:48 am

I know what you mean (I think you’re cool!) I still read all kinds of blogs, and the fact that yours is daily life with amazing photographs is what makes yours so awesome! Although I have a book blog I feel as if I don’t fit into a category either, it’s just what I like to talk about and I don’t have real life friends who read (odd I know) that I can discuss books with haha :):):)
Anaiz recently posted..Birthday Week- Day 1

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Salma February 24, 2011 at 11:07 am

You know what Maddy, find good friends who will stop by every time you post (if they can). I know what you’re speaking about. Every single blogger has something to say. Who could take that away from a person? No one. After my son died, I got the message…blogger friends have different interests. They didn’t necessarily want to hear about certain aspects of my life. I found friends who did. It’s about comments and followers then people probably haven’t even gotten to know you.

When I wad grieving my son, I wrote posts about being so sad and at the end of my rope, and I would get comments that said, “glad all’s well…. That means the person didn’t read my post…that’s not why I blog. I guess the question for you is Why do YOU Blog?

I come over here because I am interested in what you write (once I found your blog). You are a creative person with a life…you are open and show a part of your life that interest me. On the other hand, you may not see me the same way (right?). So I guess it’s what I want out of blogging.

Okay, that was a long ramble…sorry.
You’re a great photographer, writer, auntie, and friend…I see that from your writing. That’s enough for me to keep coming back.
Salma recently posted..What I have learned from my children

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pop champagne February 24, 2011 at 11:23 am

interesting post. it’s weird, when I started out blogging it was all nice and dancy, and then got into the fashion scene here, and honestly it’s like a bunch of 20 year olds still trapped in 14 year olds mind set, so many sketchy and petty things happening at shows etc… sigh. some people are just immature regardless to whether they’re out of highschool or not!
pop champagne recently posted..Kelly Osbourne for Madonnas Material Girl Photoshoot

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Stephanie Faris February 24, 2011 at 12:01 pm

I try to read all the blogs of those who comment mine, but every now and then I find I just can’t. Either the blog is about something I know nothing about — like politics or sewing — or it’s a giveaway blog and I have no idea what to say or the person has spewed out ten paragraphs about her personal dramas. I feel like, in that case, the whole ‘tit for tat’ commenting just isn’t for me.
Stephanie Faris recently posted..Fattening Restaurant Salads

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Christina Lee February 24, 2011 at 2:22 pm

Nicely said, my friend! You can sit at MY lunch table anytime!
Christina Lee recently posted..Diversity in Your Writing

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Nora February 24, 2011 at 2:46 pm

Mamarazzi; good word. I’ve not heard that one before.
I often feel that I don’t totally fit in either but I forge on.
I think I’m just one of those personal life bloggers; as to lifestyle blogs and topic blogs, i don’t know if there is a difference. Maybe? Seems not though more often than not.

Great topic today!
Nora recently posted..Ten on Tuesday- My Questions!

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Liz February 24, 2011 at 2:49 pm

I agree with a lot of the others above me. I’ll follow any “type” if I can have a conversation with the blogger! I’d rather have no comments than fake ones any day!

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Meri February 24, 2011 at 4:20 pm

I’m not sure I know how to categorize my blog- I switch topics each month so I feel like I get different kinds of comments, which means I get to discover all sorts of neat different blogs!
It’s funny, because in high school I always had a few friends from each clique too, I guess I’m sort of a blog “floater” haha.
I like to comment when I like a blog or a post, and I love comments no matter who they come from (don’t we all!)
I think its fine not to have a particular “topic,” and to just write whatever you want!
Meri
merigoesround.blogspot.com
Meri recently posted..Fruit Cocktail

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Audrey Allure February 24, 2011 at 6:03 pm

I find the blogging community fairly warm, although I don’t exactly know what category my blog really falls under – I guess under random! Haha. I do like reading a lot of different types of blogs though :)

By the way, I’m going to send you an email about an upcoming event which I hope you can attend! :)
Audrey Allure recently posted..Tasty Thursdays- Oatmeal Cranberry Cookies

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Donna February 24, 2011 at 8:25 pm

I like a healthy mixture of blogs.. some baking, crafts, photography, web design. I guess if you look at my Google Reader list, that would be a ‘lifestyle blog’ in itself. I follow more blogs than I can keep track of, but I think I know a good one when I see it.. like yours! I know what you mean about Mean Girls of the net and your efforts in making a connection not being reciprocated, but I try to not take it personal because really.. It’s just the net. Them liking me is not going to make or break me or my existence on and especially off the web. I too don’t feel like I fit in with any particular clique or group or type of blog, and that’s okay. I blog because I want to, I like it, and it’s therapeutic for me. Good post! :)
Donna recently posted..freesia time

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Elle Sees February 24, 2011 at 9:36 pm

I have a variety of fave blogs, since I’m in love with so many things.
And I’m in love with this blog!
Elle Sees recently posted..Elle Cant Cook- Brownie Trifle in Champagne Glass

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Paige February 24, 2011 at 9:44 pm

First of alll…love your blog. May have mentioned that before. I have to say, I feel just like you described. I’m a “write about whatever” kinda gal. I take pictures, but that’s not all I am. Love photography blogs, I’m just not one. I don’t have kids and even though I read a few mommy blogs…not my thing. Same with cooking. Love it, post about it ocassionally, but I’d rather write about ME.

If I had to choose, I like to read blogs like ours – diverse. Nothing wrong with a niche blog but if I have to sacrafice tons of followers so that I can just have a few close blog friends and read a few blogs, that’s me. I don’t need 3000 people reading when the 78 that do are really important to me. And they are.
Paige recently posted..t is for thanksgiving index

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Marz February 24, 2011 at 10:32 pm

Hey Maddy!
Thanks for your comment on my blog :) I’m glad I’m not the only one who has not figured out the whole corporate thing.
I really like this post and you partly got to the root of why I didn’t blog so much in the past couple of months. i think that I was too focused on making my blog a topic blog that would appeal to everyone – but it didn’t appeal to me! I think that your blog is so great because you stick to the things that speak about you and how interesting you really are. Keep doing what you’re doing because its great! :D

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Eileen February 25, 2011 at 1:44 am

Honestly Maddy, I thought You were too cool for me! You’re way up there on the pedestal! ~ When I started my blog, I wanted it to be crafty, post my projects, etc… then when I started strolling through blogland, I discovered there was so much more that I wanted to post and I started feeling really inadequate and doubting that I had anything to offer {and getting further away from what I intended}. I know exactly what you mean, I enjoy reading a variety of blogs, but I certainly didn’t fit into any of those categories. However, I must admit, my heart’s desire is to be a pretty sewing blog that inspires others to want to make stuff {there is a visual I’m still seeking to keep up with :) }…but, oh, here it is, Maddy..I don’t want to be just a topic blog! Comments ~ Of course, I enjoy getting them and I love commenting back to each, even if it’s one, even if it’s a simple hello. I know from my blog that the people who wrote short and sweet comments at the beginning have become very dear blog friends over time! And I’m with you…I’ve got the best blog friends out there, supportive and so encouraging no matter what. And that makes me happy! I had to remind myself that if blogging was my online journal of sorts, then I have to stick with what I believe and what I love, rather than putting pressure on myself to try and be some{one/thing} that would appeal to the cliques. Did that make any sense?

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Emily February 25, 2011 at 6:10 am

When I think about blogging, I remember that most blogging began as a place to talk about you as the blogger and your life. The good, bad and the ugly. I don’t really know what kind of blogger I am but I know that I am drawn to bloggers that talk about their lives and what they like as a person much like you my friend.

P.S. I totally know what you mean about the cliches in blog world. I have WONDERFUL bloggy friends but I have felt the snuff too.
Emily recently posted..Spring fever

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Rachel February 25, 2011 at 2:29 pm

When I started blogging, I definitely didn’t expect to make friends with people or anything like that. But I feel like I’ve made such great friends because of it. It’s a great little community, but obviously there are some people that just aren’t interested in talking or developing any kind of relationship.

I read all kinds of blogs since I love to read and check out new things. You never know what you might find!
Rachel recently posted..Friday Favorites

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Sabine February 25, 2011 at 2:39 pm

I like all kind of blogs (but I do especially like photography blogs :) and never been the cliquey type either… Often there is a really mean (girl) streak in in groups. One of the things I love about blogs is that it gives you the opportunity to get together with people and interests you might not meet otherwise – the strange thing is that I realised that a lot of bloggers act in groups (only comment to each other, meet up IRL, support each other, but no one else), which is kind of sad.
Sabine recently posted..LFW – Get-a-Hat

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WendyB February 25, 2011 at 9:25 pm

I like writing about everything too!
WendyB recently posted..Fashion Bloggers Caught Red-Legged

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Michaela February 26, 2011 at 12:21 pm

Uncool? Girl you have a million comments on each of your posts!! LOL! You are super cool to me that’s for sure!

I personally gravitate towards topic blogs HOWEVER I do have a few blogs that I read that are just about life and I love them. They give me an insight to their lives that I usually don’t get from topic blogs. I love the personal touches not just telling me how they made their latest headboard or how much weight they lost that week.

I am a crappy blog friend though. I open up Google Reader, read through all of the blog posts each day but for some reason I can’t ever seem to find the right words to comment. I do read and pay attention to each one though!

I love love love your blog!!
Michaela recently posted..and the weight loss begins AGAIN!

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Mindy February 26, 2011 at 7:52 pm

first, I take offense to Becky’s comment about meeting each other in a room full of 40 somethings…I’M NOT 40 YET!!!! for the love of all thats good…she knows I read your blog, she should know better than to publicly post that!!!! :)

I have definitely felt some of what you are saying re: cliques in bloggyland. however, i try to take it in stride. I think that certain people will connect, be it a common ground that is immediately apparent (ie photography) or one that takes a little longer to develop and happens after an initial connection to the blog is made. For me, the blogs I follow and read regularly are the ones that i enjoy the writer’s perspective and view on life, or that I have an appreciation for their talents, be it photography, art or writing. I am not the best blogger, and will never be, but I hope that the people that pop over to see my blog can appreciate me for who I am, and for the little snippets that I post….
you are super cool in my book :)

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Nadette March 1, 2011 at 10:05 am

I don’t have a preference for style of blog, I just need something to speak to me, and your blog definitely does that. I know how you feel, with your blog not quite being able to fit neatly into one category, because then you can talk about all manner of cool things, including your amazing photography. I think all of us bloggers got into this world for different reasons, so that’s why there can be this clique-ish ways among some blogs-which is pretty tragic if you ask me. I for one, couldn’t fathom that I would make new friends through this venture, but I’m so glad that I have, and that you’re one of them my dear. The mean girls don’t matter to anyone but themselves, lol
Nadette recently posted..Afternoon Crumbs

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The Guilty Hyena March 1, 2011 at 12:44 pm

I don’t think there should be a particular format for a blog, do what feels right to you, your blog works well as it is, It has that personal touch. When I was at high school I never fitted in any category too, and I don’t feel I do even to this day.

Though my blog is mainly surrounded by fashion, I don’t really have intrinsic interest in focusing on latest fashion news from all the major design houses, and recognizing names of all the major models. To that extent I deliberately keep oblivious, and that makes me no fashionsta, I like you have a wide range of interests, but I think you do a good job of sharing them.

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Marlene March 2, 2011 at 1:44 am

Girl…I just love you. Do you want to know WHY I love you??? You do You…and I sorta kinda like that if you haven’t figured that out about me yet.

I think of my blog as MY domain. It’s my place in this world where I can just relax and be me. Some of it I choose to share…some of it not so much…I do crafts such as quilting, crochet, painting, glass blowing, and photography…I also experience this amazing life.

I don’t fit into a preconcieved box either, and it doesn’t really matter to me that I don’t.

I find those blogs to be the most capitvating because you can never really guess whatcha gonna get…

Rock On Baby GIrl….you got this.
Marlene recently posted..I Promise More Tomorrow!

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